Its Ok, We can Stop Now

I just wanted to take the time to tell you thank you for your work and for working for the housing issues in our communities. I never thought I would find myself in a homeless shelter, but I have a rare autoimmune as well as an officially undiagnosed autoimmune syndrome and my body is overreactive to just about everything. If I get around Vape for more than a minute it’s an ER trip.

2 years ago I was constantly at level 9 and 10 pain in our home. I thought it was just my immune condition causing me more trouble and flaring up but one day in a moment of mental breakdown I took the last $300 and took myself and my at the time 11 year old daughter to the castle up in Colorado Springs just to detox and take some time to pray.

I slept the entire night pain-free and realized it was my house. The house that we were blessed with by my husband’s grandparents now 100-year-old house that we had maintained on a janitor’s salary for a family of five was no longer sustainable on that income.

It had high levels of radon and mold.

My daughter had to go to her adult sister’s house and I went to a homeless shelter while my husband tried to navigate what to do. We lived for years on 3,000 a month now thankfully with the increased salary it is closer to 4,000 but that is still challenging in Denver.

I finally was able to settle into a lovely B&B situation with my 12 year old where the woman was incredibly generous charging me only $250 a week rent for a space.

With my health conditions it is difficult for me to pick up work but I picked up some side cleaning jobs working for friends that understood my condition.

I also would detox at the homeless shelter up in Colorado Springs when I couldn’t handle Denver air because of my sensitivities.

Just recently my adult daughter who’s almost finished with her college degree out at Notre Dame found a location off of C-470 in Bowles.

Every apartment that I have tried to visit I am highly allergic to and I have to leave within 5 minutes because the pain level skyrockets and I have reactions to certain triggers, so for example plug-in scents can cause this, cigarettes can be an ER trip, but my daughter found a 55 plus brand new facility with individual Air instead of central air and I was amazed to find I was not allergic to it.

But I said there was no way we could afford it. But thanks to the government help it looks like it’s actually going to work out.

We are still in the works and I don’t know where the numbers are going to fall. But if we can get approved for the finances it would only cost us $1,600 a month for the first year to live there which we could afford it’d be tight but we could afford it.

So I’m praying that works out.


I will say one of the major problems in our society today is the lack of training that many humans have had over the centuries in living simply.

My mother and father were Depression and World War II era and we lived simply.

One of the biggest problems that I find even with myself among the lower income is that the upper income are very free on their spendings on many things and it becomes a cultural expectation to own video games or a big TV or go out to eat or drink Starbucks.

It would highly benefit Society to find ways to enjoy life once again in a more old-fashioned way that don’t cost money.

Even within my church I get frustrated because social outings always cost money, though they are kind and often will scholarship things for those who need it.

Going to baseball games various things are all very expensive. We used to just have potlucks and have wonderful social times at the church in that fashion.

But now every social interaction that I have with friends that are of higher wealth, and they are sweet as all can get don’t get me wrong, they just don’t understand what it’s like to not to have that kind of Freedom with money, if my children and I want to interact with our Circle of Friends, it’s impossible to do it without spending money.

People don’t invite us over to their house and I with my health issues cannot fix a meal that is appropriate in my home for others and plus I’m at the B&B right now.

I wish there could be a community Grassroots initiative to find interactions and return to Our Roots from over 100 years ago where Community was enjoyed without cost.

Instead of closing Community off to those who cannot afford it. Hikes and parks are one way and I’m trying with my health issues to do better at that. Perhaps the libraries could have some forms of initiatives.

But one of the problems with those of lower income is that there is a cost right now for socializing.

Our lives are very expensive because if our kids are to fit in they have to have things that meet the social expectations like video games. I wish there was a way to help those people who don’t know what it’s like to not be able to afford trash bags and paper towels to be able to understand what this is like and help create environments and re-establish environments that don’t cost money.

The other attack against our economy for the past 150 years has been completely removing meaningful work from a large portion of society. It started with the manufacturing error and I’ll leave that typo, okay I’m glad we don’t have to hand make toilet paper, but the manufacturing of clothes and pottery and art was and is a huge mistake.

It took meaningful work from a large portion of population and the concept of manufacturing and globally is completely ridiculous and unsustainable but no one deals with that obvious fact.

We waste trillions of dollars globally on things that are manufactured and not purchased at the value they should be. By putting limits not through government, but through social change initiatives instead of creating another bar and grill, teaching people to sew again and paying somebody to make an outfit that actually fits and teach people Pottery again and make bowls and cups that are handmade and bring meaningful work back into society especially for those that are right brained creative types.

There are many things we have done to create an unsustainable Society over the past 150 years. And we continue to do it with computers and AI so excited about all the things that can be done quickly without effort, forgetting that that effort and work are part of the sustenance of life and that each individual needs meaningful work or they do not feel they have value.

I was raised ghetto Brooklyn. And one of the biggest needs of poor people is to feel just as accepted and valued as the rich. And there are a lot of people with lower income that do not succumb to this mentality, but it’s difficult not to. The mentality that you have to have certain things and act a certain way to be of equal value to those other people that have more money. I remember the first time I went to a church that was a higher income than I was accustomed to. Thankfully it was a very loving gracious church and I had no problems, but I was so scared because I could never afford makeup. I did not have the look. End of this day I don’t even when I can’t afford it because for myself I need to make that statement though sometimes people don’t understand. There are more important things in life then covering up flaws.

And in the Kingdom of Heaven my value and acceptance has nothing to do with how I look but rather with who I am. I am a child of a living God through the blood of Jesus Christ my savior who offers his hand freely to all Humanity and invites all to become his children through a living faith in him.

This frees money up to sponsor a child in Uganda. Focusing on what is needed for life rather than what is not needed. And it’s always good no matter what our income to find somebody more in need than ourselves and make that the first priority. When you are a parent of a little child that might be the first priority. But people can live on very little. We get in trouble and here I am 100% guilty, and truly the weakest of many people in this, when we have to have our comfort over what is needed for life. Comfort is quite expensive. Life is not.

In the Ghetto of Brooklyn where I grew up young men would have gold jewelry and fancy sports cars that they couldn’t afford because there was a mindset that we need to be just as good as those rich people.

So sometimes when people can’t afford housing it’s not because they don’t have the money, it’s because we aren’t using the money to the best if it’s ability.

I am still struggling after 10 years not to eat out too much. And it’s ridiculous. We could eat rice and beans and be perfectly okay but we are trained to have certain tasting meals and when I’m too sick to make a meal properly we go out to eat and so I am at fault when the money is not handled properly. I know there’s Grace and I’m not mad at myself but I’m working still to do better at living within our means. Beans and rice and peanut butter with some good vegetables is really all we need. Some meat because we have still a 12-year-old and plenty of carbs which can be potatoes and rice. Food does not have to be expensive especially with the food banks.

It’s just we get into the habit of it having a certain taste and heaven forbid the meals or our lives be boring, that is one of the biggest sins in this generation. We can do all sorts of things but heaven forbid we are bored. I am rolling my eyes here. I do suspect Abraham Lincoln, George Washington and the depression error would be horrified at how we live so carelessly and so wastefully. And so hopefully we can grow as a community in that area.

Maybe we’re spending it on drugs or alcohol, gambling which is all over the place now and it’s making me sick at how it’s pushed at every level, potato chips, snack bars, chocolate, coffee, more coffee, did I mention coffee? – and in many other ways other than for what is simply needed for life.

We are a society completely bored with life because we’ve taken meaningful work away, we are short circuiting ourselves in many different areas. But it’s okay, because we can stop now. We can take the computer and put it in the basement. Remove the big TV off the wall and donate it. There are so many changes we can make because surely we are not slaves, right? We are free to make healthy changes that not only will impact our lives but many around us including our children for many generations to come.

If we find we are not free and we cannot break free from mentalities that keep us slaves, then we have to go to the source for help. Then we will have to turn to God and get on our knees and pray and ask him for the power to change.

But just like it’s really hard to go 65 miles an hour when everybody around you is going 85 miles an hour, it’s really hard to do what’s right within the lower income when everybody else is living differently and finding their fun in ways that must cost money.

Eventually the lack of limits in our society is going to cause one big crash. Just like the lack of limits on the roads increases the likelihood of death and destruction.

The other thing is children used to be raised at home and taught from an early age how to cook and clean and do practical things and brain patterns were set to do all of that and if you were trained that way you take it for granted.

But many of the poor income people their children are raised by watching TV or playing video games not learning needed skills for life. If you don’t have movement and training and cleaning a house because moms and dads are too tired to come home and train the children after a long day of work, then the children have years of brain patterns that will take another bunch of years to retrain in learning how to enjoy meaningful work.

Those who have more income can help create environments for Meaningful work and create environments for fun that benefit the poor by not always costing money.

There is an entire mindset that needs to be changed in our culture.

I did the math and if every working human contributes $600,000 we can pay off the national debt. We really really need to learn how to put limits in our own lives and on society. Because if we do not place them upon ourselves and if we have to get God to help us then we need to get on our knees and seek God until we are capable of making change, but if we do not place the limits upon ourselves, be assured some force will come in to do it for us and then we will truly understand what it means to be a Slave. People that cannot rule themselves must be ruled by others. And you can go through history and see that dynamic and that’s scary. So let’s acknowledge our problem not denying it like an alcoholic who says he has no problem, and then let’s section off time each day to take one small area and seek to make change.

Take only what we need for life. Start getting rid of the excess. Before it destroys us and our children.

Take a quick Google look at where America’s money is going. I would think our nation is probably one of the wealthiest Nations throughout the course of humanity . We are the kings and queens of this world.

How much money are we spending on sports? On tv? On movies? On entertainment? On clothing?

If you could start an initiative starting with yourself and setting the example to set limits so that we have just what we need for life and then training others and how to live with what they need for life you will make one of the biggest impacts on the poverty problem in America.

We don’t need more self-driving cars and bigger fancier homes, we need to return to a more peaceful way of living that doesn’t have to have more more, but is content with what is needful for life, thankful for hot running water and roach free homes that are warm in the winter and cool in the summer.

And find our enjoyment instead of things that take away so much income and take so much work, find our enjoyment once again in relationship with God, from whom All Good Things Come and who gives us wisdom on how to use it, family and community.

This will be the biggest impact that we could have on this generation economically.

I appreciate your hard work and I pray for your protection and God’s grace and peace.

Last Thought…

It would do well for us to admit where we are wrong first to God, then to our families and then to those who need to hear us say we are sorry, sometimes even publicly.

For pride and greed in the Bible is equally a damnable sin to murder so nobody is going to be able to boast in the day of judgment in anything other than the cross of Jesus Christ.

That is very difficult for us when we are taught that we must exalt ourselves and find our self worth in what we do rather than in Who We Are and in God’s love for us.

Because ultimately if it is through our good works that we find Value, we either have to lie about our faults, down playing The Faults of the person in the mirror while exalting the faults of those on the other side of the room to make us look better than others, but at the cross that just simply doesn’t work. The lies will be gone the moment we pass through the Veil. And so we can be humble.

Humility is amazing. I don’t think we can be humble unless we understand God’s love. That is enough to make a saint out of a sinner. And so every Valley will be raised up in every Hill be made low, the Crooked places straight and the rough places plain and there will be the equality people have desired so fiercely but it’s only found at the cross.

But rather we should cling to Jesus into the cross and do our best to grow in the place where God has planted us.

That was very long, but sometimes one has to spend a little bit of time digging through dirt to get to the gold…

…and I doubt it will get past the Gatekeepers, but thank you. God’s peace. And thank you for all of your work.